Children's play & magic

One of our children’s greatest assets is their imagination, and this is never more true than when teaching them about magic. Their creativity is unlimited as is their capacity for using magic, and it is up to us, the parents, to teach them how to focus, control and ethically send out that energy for specific ends. How to do that, however, and keep their interest in the lessons can sometimes be difficult, especially when the traditional motifs of love and light don’t necessarily work.

In my search for opportunities to teach my four-year-old son, Ulrich, about the elements, spirits, negative and positive, and other things magic, I have discovered it’s most effective to use his interests, those things that get him excited every day. He’s all boy … sports, superheroes, wrestling with his friends, Lego knights, Star Wars, sword fighting, G.I. Joe and Transformers. While not all of these things provide easy opportunities, their imagination can make it so.

With action figures, like the G.I. Joe and Transformers, Ulrich’s imagination encourages him to use energy to manifest specific situations in which the figures find themselves. He is in complete control of this manifestation, this play, these things that happen to those characters. He molds their personalities, their reactions, their abilities. And while complete control is impossible in the “real world,” control of one’s energy and one’s imagination becomes a very important lesson for further lessons.

Sports also encourages learning control. In soccer, for example, he learns to control the ball, to make it go where he wants it to go. If I compare the soccer ball to a ball of energy, I show him how I can focus, point it in a specific direction by making small adjustments with my foot as it hits the ball. With a basketball or football, the focus is through the hands. It takes energy to play, and playing well takes even more energy. With small children, this type of exercise (whether they realize it as an exercise or not) incorporates increasing the amount of energy it takes to continue playing well, to get more skilled at the game, to focus better and to use some of that energy to interact with other players. Just like with any social situation, playing team sports also provides children with “social skills,” how to be a “good sport” and not get angry, to appreciate the skill and focus of the other players.

Ulrich’s Lego knights play set has a dragon and a magic sword set in a large crystal. We have discussions about what dragons are, which invariably leads to talking about other magical creatures that one might find in medieval fairy-tales, like fairies, sprites and brownies. The magic sword, on Ulrich’s own volition, becomes a stylus that transforms people and things around it. In effect, the little, plastic sword is an athame in play through Ulrich’s imagination.

An obvious allusion, Jedi Knights’ use of the Force is a study in magic. In the words of Qui-Gon, “The Force flows through us,” like Chi, Ki, life energy, divine energy. While Jedi are able to easily manipulate physical objects, they are also able to predict the future, to sense changes in the energy of their environment, to “know” when something’s not right. With a psychic and/or empathic child, these lessons can be invaluable. Ulrich is both. Whenever a situation calls for it, we talk about how this feeling belongs to him and that feeling actually belongs to someone else. And at an age where getting him to stop talking can often be a challenge, Ulrich has already learned not to share with strangers when he “knows” about them. When he does talk to people he sees every day, he does so, of course, using the vocabulary he has, usually referring to situations through the lexicon of the X-Men or Marvel comics. This isn’t to say, however, that he won't lack self-control later, and his vocabulary will expand. But those are lessons for later!

There are opportunities everywhere for us parents to teach our children about the basics of magic. They are already magical; they innately know this and can use magic. What we teach them is control, self-control and focus of that magical energy, along with a moral compass that will hopefully help them become ethical adults. Using their current interests, those things that they already love, we can make opportunities through their play to teach them those lessons.

This article appears on Family Wiccan Traditions International, Inc. Web site.

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